head colds are difficult for everyone, but i feel that the halls cough drops folks are getting unseemly amounts of pleasure from kicking those who are down.
"a pep talk in every drop" sounds like a cheerful idea at the outset, but it is perhaps the nature of their work - catering to the phlegmy, muzzy-headed ill - that brings out the vindictive, aggressive side of these drop-mongers. what are meant to be encouraging words come off like the assaulting catch phrases a-type sports fathers scream at their children from the sidelines at practice.
competitive sports never were my metier, and now is really not the time to be fending off soccer dads. i wish you'd leave well enough alone, halls; just print out a picture of a rabbit or something inoffensive that a congested head can process, hmm? you don't see the tissues offering judgment.
...yet.
"a pep talk in every drop" sounds like a cheerful idea at the outset, but it is perhaps the nature of their work - catering to the phlegmy, muzzy-headed ill - that brings out the vindictive, aggressive side of these drop-mongers. what are meant to be encouraging words come off like the assaulting catch phrases a-type sports fathers scream at their children from the sidelines at practice.
competitive sports never were my metier, and now is really not the time to be fending off soccer dads. i wish you'd leave well enough alone, halls; just print out a picture of a rabbit or something inoffensive that a congested head can process, hmm? you don't see the tissues offering judgment.
...yet.
OMFG! i never noticed this! hilarious and horrifying!!!!
ReplyDeletei have had the worst colds of my life in the last two months. AWFUL. and i have sucked on a whole lot of halls. have you tried the sugar-free version? they make you SHIT. and shit. and shit. SERIOUSLY.
That is plain old annoying. I feel kind of like a belligerent teenager reading those, "What if I don't WANT to get back in the game, Halls?" Don't tell me what to do and what not to do...pshaw.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, "Hi!" and now is it kind of weird that I went back to read my comment on The Empress and saw you were following me so then I stopped over here (uninvited)? Did I overstep those boundaries? Wanna play Barbies sometime? ;)